About a year ago, my relationship with this "perfect" guy suddenly ended after 2 years. At the time, I had recently moved to a brand new town in the middle-of-nowhere, Texas, and I was completely alone. All I was left with were the memories of him saying "I don't know WHY I have to leave you, but I know that God is telling me that I have to let you go". I remembered the tears that I saw him cry for the first time as he drove away, leaving me with nothing. My prayer the day was before was "God, I'm not sure why, but you've brought me here and I'm without my family, familiarity, my friends, my school... IF you have to take away my boyfriend, so that ALL I HAVE is You, then so be it". And for the longest time, I relied on the truth that this was God's plan, and it got me through.
Over time, though, I realized that I had begun blaming myself for all the pain we had both felt. I returned to school 8 months later thinking I didn't belong there. My whole home town changed. Thinking that now, no one wanted me. That I was hopeless. Useless. Broken. Ashamed. Alone. And I was the only one to blame. I could STILL see hurt in his eyes as he looked at me, and I blamed myself even more. Until one day, a friend opened up her Bible and assured me: You're believing all these lies in your head. You've fallen captive to them and you MUST remember the truth that you are FORGIVEN. Psalm 27:12-14. And since then, I felt God lift that HUGE mountain out of my way and off my shoulders, and I've worn the word around my neck ever since.
One of my best friends is now going through a similar situation as mine, and she feels extremely lonely and ashamed... Desperately trying to cling to truth as all these lies are flying around her head. And one morning, listening to some music and praying, I realized... "It's time to pass on the beautiful release that I felt as I realized God had already forgiven me... and it's time to pass on my word".
To my dear friend: You are already forgiven.
-Rebekah
